This blog is an excercise in catharsis. From the first word written, I have felt a certain cleansing, a feeling like weight lifting, slowly but surely, from my hunched and bent shoulders. The death of my son, Zachary Marco, his murder actually, has been a transformative event made more intense by my own obsessive resolve to help the police catch his murderers. It was highly publicized here in Arizona and made the national news because I offered a deal to the non-shooter – turn the other guy in and I will help you find a lawyer, pay for a lawyer and work with you on a plea deal. In a number of blogs, I was compared to Mel Gibson in Ransom which is only true to the extent that my offer was just a vehicle. Really, all I wanted to do was stay in the news and get the word out: Find my son’s laptop and cell phone, the items they killed him over, and you find the killers. That part of it worked. A lady found his bag, found the laptop and turned it in. The fingerprints led the police to his killers. One of them now faces the death penalty.
This blog is a part of my grief process. It allows me, through the shadows of digital discourse, to open up, to put into words the feelings I have thus far bottled into self imposed isolation. I have, to be sure, actually forced myself not to write.
SO here I find myself, the parent of a murdered child, a career criminal defense attorney who gave up his practice on the day his son was shot, and a lonley man, looking into an uncertain future, writing about something I never permitted myself before: Feelings.
You can find me at www.mmwazlaw.com